I am the “Whitest Black Woman” You will ever meet

I’ve heard this a few times over the years. Most people who have the balls to say something so stupid think it’s a compliment. In reality it’s sad.

I was raised by white people. The only image I have of Black culture is an abusive drug addicted father. I had no connection as I was growing up to Black Culture.

As a Spiritualist I know that I above all others am supposed to be welcoming and kind to all people, regardless of their beliefs lifestyles or whatever other categories people use to label themselves. As a human being it angers me to no end that the likes of Shawn King and Rachel Dolezal are continuing this narrative of pretending to be something they aren’t. Especially because they have been welcomed by the Black Community in a way I never was. Perhaps it stems from jealousy and perhaps it stems from the fact that I am actually a person of color.

Perhaps it’s because as a child I was so focused on being a victim and everyone around me was so busy trying to figure out “what was wrong with me” that no one ever stopped to consider I needed to feel connected to my culture.

I am a Jamaican, English, Irish, Scottish Gypsy. I grew up in a world not understanding why Black men and women in America were raped beaten kidnapped and treated less than human. I grew up in Canada being told how lucky I was to live in a place that saved so many Black lives, while simultaneously doing the same thing to Aboriginals.

Here’s the sick thing;

Jamaicans say I am too white. English, Irish and Scottish will not see me as white however and Gypsy’s would deny me all together because I was not raised in a Gypsy tribe. So who am I? Where do I fit? Apparently nowhere.

Yet Rachel Dolezal and Shawn King have received millions of dollars in support, and hundreds of thousands of fans around the world for being something that they are not. How the fuck does that work?!

When Rachel Dolezal was at Howard University she sued the University for retracting her scholarship, later she says that Howard is where she came to understand and feel connected to the Black community. Now she’s written a book, changed her name to something more “African” (I can’t spell or say it out so I won’t try.) Are you fucking kidding me?!

I walk down the street in a city that is filled with a mixture of Asians, White people of various descent, Indo-Canadians, Aboriginals and a smattering of Black people.

Yet I feel no connection to anyone who was raised with Black Culture, I don’t understand the way they speak or the food they eat, I don’t understand what it means to really be Black because I’ve never as I said earlier, been raised by people of Black culture.

So to hear someone say “I don’t fit in anyone’s category I am what I say I am” makes me sick to my stomach. How fucking dare you? How dare you take MY story, and MY struggles and use them to make money for yourself – because at the end of the day that’s what you’re doing. Much like Deric Lostutter Shawn King is accused of taking “donations” and pocketing them because hey “Black Power.” I could use some money, I’d love to go to Jamaica and meet my genetic family and learn about my culture, anyone want to start a go-fund me for me?

I would love to meet my sisters and my brother that I’ve never met before and get to know the family that was denied to me as a child. I would love to know who these people are and to understand them. I would love to be more involved with the Canadian Jamaican culture but sadly they don’t want me either.

If I as a LGBTQ Rights supporter decided to tell the world I had contracted HIV and asked for donations, collected thousands and put it in my pocket I’d be stoned, yet when it comes to Shawn King no one seems to care that he’s pretending to be Black. Instead people are now desensitized to this Race Fakery because of Rachel Dolezal. So at least there is that. Now because of her anyone can pretend to be a person of color and get paid for it.

That’s just fucking awesome.

Meanwhile the rest of us are out here on the outside wishing we were either Black or White instead of being stuck in the fucking hateful middle.

I don’t have any wisdom or universal thoughts of understanding to add to this post. All I can say is that while these two people are taking attention from real problems the Black community of the world face, I sit here enraged.

All my love,

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2 Comments

  1. I haven’t been keeping up on what those two people are doing, but I get the picture and your rage. I have no answer to solve that predicament, but can hope tha somehow you can get that trip to Jamaica. Beyond that, I care less about what you are than who.

    You do set me thinking how my own parents and grandparents left behind any significant connection to their immigrant forebears (of whom I only know there were Scots and Germans) to become generic middle class whites divorced from any “old country”. There is a sadness in that.

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