He said that to me the day before he didn’t show up for our date.
Why am I so sweet?
After everything I’ve been through, and everything I’ve seen and in some cases even done..I’ve learned that being sweet being honest and openly making mistakes is the only way to live.
I’m far from perfect. I’ve made mistakes – I’ve lost friends. I missed signs that could have saved at least one child from becoming a pedophile. I’ve made enemies. I’ve created demons.
There’s a ritual we Witches have. It’s a choosing Ceremony. At thirteen we claim our magical selves.
At sixteen we choose what kind of Witch we’re going to be. Some become healers and go into nursing or counselling for instance. It’s a course some choose without even realizing that’s what they’re doing.
Others become mothers or teachers. At twenty-three we decide whether we’re going to live a life filled with love and light and positivity, or whether or not we’re going to stay in the darkness.
Others still become police officers or join the Service – protectors or as they would have said a few hundred years ago…Warriors.
I once saw a Psychic who told me that Witches – Spiritualistic people suffer the most so that we can fulfill our spiritual promise to help others when their time comes.
That pissed me off for a very long time – until I realized what she meant.
I intended, fully for this blog to be a log of how I had changed from the beginning of the year until I decide it’s time to stop writing it and the more I write the more I realize even though I’m focusing on my own goals and my own passions this year – I’m also learning a lot more about myself and my reality than I ever expected.
For instance. For the first time in my life I am actively considering taking Marijuana as a health substitute for pain killers. Why? Well because a) I’m sick to death of being sick all the fucking time. B) and more importantly I am sick to death of taking pills.
I’m reading all the research and I’m finding a Doctor who will help me get better without shoving two hundred pills a month down my throat.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve looked at my life and wished that I was living a different life.
How much I was wishing I was having an adventure. Then I think about the ones who lived a life of adventure and ended up in prison; Jeremy Hammond, Barrett Brown…or ended up worse. Like my friend JMack9. A man who never stopped believing that ordinary people like me and you could change the world…and died for speaking out.
I think about my friends, the men and women around the world I love and adore. The Police officers, teachers, nurses, writers, even Politicians. I think about those living and those dead.
I think about these people every day and while I don’t always give them the attention they deserve (there really is HUNDREDS of you.) I make time to let them know…using this blog that I didn’t really think would mean much.
I think about the many men and women who have died this year. Their stories often untold – some of them who have left behind Angels who have sworn to remember their lives -and names- every day.
I think about how many police officers have lost their lives…and how many have taken the lives of others.
I think about how lucky I am to have options in my country. I have the freedom to decide between using a herb to get better – and the right to decide Period.
I have the right to make my own decisions. And I think about the millions of women, around the world who do not have the rights and freedom’s I have.
I think as I write this about an amazing, phenomenal organization called Code To Inspire.
Code to Inspire is dedicated to teaching young Afghanistan girl’s how to code. This is a chance not only to inspire young women, it’s a chance to change the world in a very real way.
I remember as a young girl deciding to learn how to code – not to hack, but to code. I decided when MySQL came out that it was boring and hard work and I decided I’d rather get drunk then learn to code.
I wonder if all those years ago – twenty years to be exact – where I would be had I stuck with it. Had I continued to learn and grow as a coder where that skill may have led me.
I can honestly tell you it would have changed my life. Given me a workable skill and possibly helped to change the life of many others. I probably would have had many more adventures, I am sure.
People like to believe that all hackers are bad, but like anything in the world Hacking is not black and white. There is some gray – and some red, come to think of it.
Yes the skilled men and women who know how to hack can like any of us – use their talents for good or evil. I happen to have known people on both side of that line. I know of Black Hat Hackers who changed the world. The day of the Arab Spring Uprising – comes to mind.
I also happen to know that young girls living under a repressive, abusive, cult like manipulating regime could escape.
This opportunity can change lives. These young girls could go on to inspire other young girls, who will inspire other young girls and this? This gives me hope.
Hope that one day we will be filled with at least one generation built on love – honesty – trust – kindness – that one day we’ll look down from the heavens, or hey, up from the bowels of hell and see a generation that got it right.
Yes we Witches are Spiritual, and yes we believe in the power of light and dark. We believe in Good and Evil, Angels and Demons.
We also believe in the power of the human spirit. In the idea that Hope can change the world.
I’ve seen it – a thousand times. The promise of a better future not just for girls, and not even just for boys, but for every one…is not something we can turn away from.
I actively encourage you to take a look at Code to Inspire to support them and help these amazing, wonderful phenomenal teachers and Angels take their Mission Global.
I actively encourage you to teach your daughters to learn to code. To teach them that we’re not only as strong as the boys, but we’re also equally as smart.
So here’s the part where you make a choice. What if you could have that power, now? In every generation, one Coder is born, because a bunch of men who died thousands of years ago made up that rule. They were powerful men. This woman is more powerful than all of them combined. So I say we change the rule. I say my power, should be *our* power. Code to Inspire will use the essence of this keyboard to change our destiny. From now on, every girl in the world who might be a Coder, will be a Coder. Every girl who could have the power, will have the power. Can stand up, will stand up. Coders, every one of us. Make your choice. Are you ready to be strong?
-Revised Buffy Quote-
With all my love and life long support